Wednesday, January 5, 2011

How Gangsta is That?

Hate: Licorice and licorice flavored things.  Also the way licorice is spelled, which I didn't realize until this hate.  I might have to definitively say it is THE worst flavor.  All of the others I have discussed are truly awful, but I'm going to go ahead and say licorice is actually the worst.  It's up there with the worst thing ever, not just flavor.  HOW could someone eat that and be like, "oh yes, this does not make me want to shave my taste buds off."  In all honesty, if I eat something licorice flavored by accident (because it would never EVER be on purpose) I probably could vomit if I gave in to my instincts.  Isn't that what people do when they eat like poison or something?  Therefore, licorice is on the same level as fucking poison.  What's even worse is that it's considered candy.  What the fuck is that?  That shit is not candy. Who was in charge of this decision?  That is completely insane.  Stop being such a disgusting idiot and eat some real candy.

Love: My friend Jamie's life.  You don't know Jamie, and probably don't love her life as much as me, but trust me, she lives in a sitcom.  She only gets infomercial presents from people for some reason, she had a door to door job for a nonprofit organization where each outing could have been filmed for her TV show, and now she lives in China where the hilarity has surpassed that of a normal human life.  I know 99% of the people who read this have no clue what I'm talking about, but let's just say your life is worse for it.

<3
theGrump

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