Fundamentals

So I'm in the coffee shop for my daily internet binge and, TMI, but I just peed and it reminded me of this hate.

Hate:  When the toilet paper is the wrong way.  If for some reason you don't know which way is the wrong way...UNDERHAND IS CLEARLY THE WRONG WAY.  Even though I don't see how there can be a debate about it, when those commercials came out recently I was actually happy to see that I was not the only person in the universe that cared about this.  I will actually change the direction of the toilet paper if it isn't right.  I don't care if I'm in someone else's house or in a public place or whatever.  I do not want to pull that tp off the roll unless it's overhand.  The only times where I will do it are the times in public places where I physically cannot change it to overhand unless I've brought my own screwdriver or lock picking kit.  Unfortunately, I have never had these things handy when needed.  Also, if I'm in someone's house I do not care if they prefer underhand.  In my mind, it's not a preference, that is just the way it must be.  Over.  So get over it.

Love: Forks.  Not spoons or knives.  Just forks.  Don't get me wrong, I don't hate spoons and knives, I just love forks.  I don't have a very good reason for this, I can't explain my love, but I eat anything I can with a fork, even things that other...normal...people might eat with a spoon.  Ice cream, yogurt (on those rare occasions I eat yogurt), I don't know, I can't think of many examples, but you get the idea, I love my forks.

LOVE,
theGrump

PS, Tucker is the first of my unnecessary voicemail side hates.  Left me a voicemail at 7 AM.  I saw you called.  I even woke up when you called.  But I'm not going to answer my fucking phone at 7 AM, I'll call you when I wake up.