Sweepy

I wrote a whole effing blog and it got deleted and now I'm even MORE grumpy.  BAHH.

Hate:  Getting hit on.  Not getting hit on as in a normal conversation where it is mutually understood that the person is hitting on you, but the kind where the guy comes on WAY too strong and is just spewing retarded compliments and bad pick up lines.  This would be a few sentences strung together that may include (but are not limited to) one or more of the following words or phrases: fine, sexy, damn girl, hottie, mmmmm, any dumb pick up line used in a serious manner, etc.  Listen up, if you think you are attractive to a girl after giving her that bullshit, think again.  We do not want to hear it.  At least I do not want to hear it and I can't imagine someone else finding it at all enjoyable and that's all that matters for the sake of my blog.  For me, this is more like sexual harassment than a come on.  It's synonymous to guys cat calling when a girl walks by.  I mean honestly, have they EVER gotten a positive reaction??  Whyyy do they keep doing it??!?!  Not only are these guys are usually the guys that can't get a hint, I know I'm not the first or last girl of the night you've attempted to pick up and I am not in the least interested, but even more these are the guys that clearly are incapable of learning from past mistakes, aka obviously this strategy has not been working.  Not to call you out or anything boys, but I can think of a few mental disorders that have these symptoms.  In conclusion, keep your horniness to yourself.  It is not cute.

Love: Penguins.  This is big because, generally, birds are a hate of mine.  But penguins just have that natural charm.  What can I say?  I love the waddle.  They are far too cute and hilarious for their terrible weather conditions.  But I guess if they weren't there they wouldn't be so fat and adorable.  There are so many different kinds too and all are too cute.  I want a pet penguin like that guy in Japan, and it's going to wear a backpack and waddle along with me wherever I go.

Peace,
theGrump

Smelly Cat

Hate: Abercrombie's stench.  You don't even have to go into an Abercrombie and Fitch to be subjected to it's horrific odor.  You only have to be within an approximately 1 mile radius of a store.  I literally am on the verge of gagging just walking by, even if I'm across the street.  I don't understand how there are living people inside.  How could they not have immediately suffocated upon entry?  How or why that smell is so strong is a mystery.  I can't believe that they don't know that it's the WORST.  I bet if they looked closely, there would be a hole in the ozone above every Abercrombie. This is a matter of public and environmental safety.  It must be stopped.

Love: DJ Lance Rock, aka the host of Yo Gabba Gabba.  I love everything about him, from his furry marching band hat to his spandex onesie to his awesome dance moves.

Ahhh, the best.  Everyone should watch Yo Gabba Gabba.

Love,

theGrump

Dummies

Hate: When people intentionally use bad grammar.  I do not understand the appeal of sounding stupid or it's intended message.  It is so dumb.  I know that I end sentences in prepositions all the time and whatnot, but one: I don't care and two: it's not the same because I'm not intentionally doing it to...I don't even know what!  Sound cool??  That is retarded.  I may hate that mentality more than anything (except maybe fat people with skinny legs). Why would you go out of your way to say things wrong?  I know you know it is wrong and I HATE you for it.

Love: Mini anything.  Meaning anything that is smaller than normal size.  Ideally this object will fit into my cupped hands.  Almost always better than normal sized things.  THE cutest.

Love,
theGrumpp

Spice Up Your Life

Oh, time to hate again?  Good.

Hate: When the volume of the TV (and other electronic devices) is on the wrong volume number.  The right numbers clearly being multiples of 5.  I have a thing about numbers, kind of like the time thing.  I can't explain it but I have a few number things and this is one of them.  It makes me anxious, I reeeally don't like it.  In school when we used to watch things in class I learned to not look when the teacher messed with the volume because I knew they wouldn't do it right.  I also realize that this may not always be the most practical thing, so I have learned to deal with other numbers, some of them by finding patterns that I like and some just because I decided they're ok.  Some of these are 8, because its a cube, 11 because it's my fav number, 12, because of a long complicated thing involving 2, 3, 4 and 6 that I enjoy, 16 because it has a fourth root, and so on.  I think my crazy is showing.

Love: Lists.  Hence the hate list.  I cannot get through my day without making at least one list.  Doesn't everyone just feel more accomplished when they can cross things off a list?  It's the only way I can self motivate.

Love,
theGrump

A Dog Named Farfle

It's still the 21st in Seattle

Hate: Dogs that don't like to be pet.  What am I supposed to do with that??  I don't need you to hunt or be my guide dog, so what is your use if I cannot pet you?  I need to pet.  You are cute and I want to pet you and you to wag your tail.  I mean I still love it because it's a dog and I'm obsessed, but I hate it as a...person?  Usually since I love the dog so much just because it's a dog, I really just hate the owner for making their dog suck so much.

Love: VH1 reality TV.  Amazing.

Weak, but I just don't care,
theGrump

If You're Down, Then Get Down

So I just watched an episode of 30 Rock so I'm not the grumpiest right now, but we'll see where this goes.

Hate: Being late.  I am the most prompt person you know.  I cannot handle being late, it is the MOST stressful.  I can barely handle being just on time.  I can't even handle when other people are late to something that doesn't involve me in any way.  But, the true hatred lies in other people making me late.  Good god, if you make me late there will be issues.  SO rude!  How could you be so inconsiderate of my obsession with being on time.  When we set a time, that is the time.  Otherwise what is the point of setting that time, why didn't we make it later if you were going to be goddamn late.  I will be ready early, I understand you don't have to be , but you better fucking be ready at the moment that time comes because THAT WAS THE AGREEMENT.  I do hate tardiness, but I somehow think am physically incapable of being late (as long as it isn't your fault).  It just will not happen.  Once I woke up at 7:52 when I had an 8 AM lab on a different campus and I still made it.  It just seemed like it should not have been able to happen, I was so confused when I walked in and it was still 8 o'clock.  The time space continuum apparently doesn't apply to me if there is a chance I might be late.  This isn't always a good thing.  There have even been times when I have tried to be late for something informal because I thought to myself "No one else is going to show up forEVER, just be like 15 minutes late."  This specific time I ended up getting there one minute late.  Not even a minute late, when I looked at the time when I got there it was just turning to 8:01 so I was really only like 55 seconds late.  And I tried so hard!  As I mentioned, I even feel the stress when someone else is/is going to be late.  My old roommates were...one might say not quite as timely as I was, and I never understood why they weren't freaking out like me.  Do other people not feel this stress?  I'm freaking out right now thinking about it.

Love: Being scared.  It is the best feeling.  The problem is I get scared really easily and I will stay scared for a very long time.  I remember I was terrified for weeks after seeing "The Ring."  But somehow I still love the feeling.  I mean even dumb shows like Paranormal State and occasionally A Haunting (a HILARIOUS show btw) scare me and so I love to watch.  For the record I have screamed on 2 separate occasions while watching a haunting.  Yep.  So even though I love the rush of being scared...I may sleep with my lights on for a few nights afterwards...

<3
theGrump

Telephone.

Hate: Talking on the phone.  I haate it.  I'm just bad at it, and I don't like to be bad at things.  Also it's always so awkward.  Maybe my being bad at it makes it awkward, but regardless, so uncomfortable.  I never have enough things to say and there are always long pauses where I just want to hang myself.  The worst is when the other person also sucks at talking on the phone and we literally cannot hang up because neither one of us knows how to say bye.  God, it's terrible.  I always end up interrupting a long awkward pause pretty much yelling OK WELL BYE.  Most of what I need to say to you can be written in a one or two sentence text, I don't need all this dialing, ringing, talking business.  When people call me I never answer because I just don't want to.  Don't like.  On more than one occasion I have deliberately not answered a phone call because I hate them and then immediately texted the person right after asking what they want.  And obviously when I call someone I'm not going to leave a voicemail because I hate them, which brings me to another problem because I hate when people don't answer my call.  I know this is hypocritical because I never answer my phone, but it's like I'm probably only calling you because you initiated some sort of situation where I have to, and if you don't answer it pisses me off.  I spend time getting over the initial anger that I have to call you and you don't answer, you're a fucking bastard.

Which brings me to the love of the day...

Love: Texting.  The best form of communication.  There are so many times in my day where something weird or funny or terrible happens and I have no one with me to immediately share it with, so I can just text someone...or everyone.  For example, yesterday after a night of me being WAY too drunk, I woke up and looked at my outgoing calls and noticed that 911 had been dialed.  And I was like oh...whoooooops.  So I texted a few people informing them because I thought it was pretty hilarious, and I texted my roommate, hoping she would know what happened and if I did it on purpose, haha.  Also, I never get annoyed with texting because they don't have to answer immediately, or ever really, because it's just a text.  There is one small texting problem but it just comes from my own ocd, not the texting process.  I really dislike having texts in my sent/received box so I have to immediately delete them right after I send/read them.  This causes two problems, 1. sometimes people answer me, but it's been a little while and I forgot what I said to them which is a little awkward, and 2. I tend to keep up this habit during a night of drinking so I have no way of recalling the drunken texts I sent out in the morning.

So from this post you have learned not to call me, and also I'm minorly an alcoholic.  Good.

LOVE,
theGrump