I can't hate about what I want to hate about because I fear I will be dubbed a terrorist and taken away in the middle of the night and that would scare my roommate so this will have to suffice...
Hate: Bread and butter pickles. First of all, sweet pickles are fucking disgusting. They are just embarrassing in comparison to dill pickles and I hate anyone who might think otherwise because they are obviously an idiot. Secondly, I hate that they are called bread and butter pickles. That makes no sense. I also just hate the phrase bread and butter unless you are literally talking about bread and butter. I realized this after Harry Potter says it in the 5th movie and I was so annoyed.
Love: Fall, as in the season (although I also like when people fall). It is by far the best season.
Love,
theGrump
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
There's a Moment You Know You're Fucked
I think people are probably pretty used to my super specific hates by now...
Hate: In movies and on TV when people are flipping through magazines they are always flipping backwards. What the hell, people? It's not like there is no content in there. Why are you even looking at the magazine if you aren't interested in reading it correctly?? Would you do that if you were holding a book?? It's still written just like everything else, you start at the cover buddy. I mean I know you don't necessarily have to read the articles in order or look at pictures in a particular order, but it still is annoying as hell. Also you're generally reading a magazine to kill time, like waiting for an appointment or on the beach or whatever, if you really want to waste time, go through the pages like a normal human being and maybe read an article or two. Get into character, bitch. Even if you're just pretending to read it, no one is buying it if you're going backwards. Be better at your fucking job.
Love: Ke$ha. She's a dang genius. I wish I could just be drunk and say stupid shit all the time and be rich as hell for it. Going to her show tomorrow with the roomie, not at all ashamed. Going to be a hot mess covered in glitter wearing my wolf shirt and sparkle skirt and could not be happier about it. She just makes me want to dance and go crazy so everyone better get the f out of my way.
LOVE
theGrump
Hate: In movies and on TV when people are flipping through magazines they are always flipping backwards. What the hell, people? It's not like there is no content in there. Why are you even looking at the magazine if you aren't interested in reading it correctly?? Would you do that if you were holding a book?? It's still written just like everything else, you start at the cover buddy. I mean I know you don't necessarily have to read the articles in order or look at pictures in a particular order, but it still is annoying as hell. Also you're generally reading a magazine to kill time, like waiting for an appointment or on the beach or whatever, if you really want to waste time, go through the pages like a normal human being and maybe read an article or two. Get into character, bitch. Even if you're just pretending to read it, no one is buying it if you're going backwards. Be better at your fucking job.
Love: Ke$ha. She's a dang genius. I wish I could just be drunk and say stupid shit all the time and be rich as hell for it. Going to her show tomorrow with the roomie, not at all ashamed. Going to be a hot mess covered in glitter wearing my wolf shirt and sparkle skirt and could not be happier about it. She just makes me want to dance and go crazy so everyone better get the f out of my way.
LOVE
theGrump
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Time of Death Undetermined
My elbow hurts so this is a one/left handed hate so this needs to be short...
Hate: In this Pediasure commercial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rM7Vfe0UJ-E, the way the little girl says "I'm going outside to play." She is the worst. Who let that happen.
No love, this is hard.
Bye cuties
theGrump
Hate: In this Pediasure commercial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rM7Vfe0UJ-E, the way the little girl says "I'm going outside to play." She is the worst. Who let that happen.
No love, this is hard.
Bye cuties
theGrump
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Who's Gonna Save the World Tonight
This is dedicated to de Whip.
Hate: When people eat all but one little bite of something. WHAT are you leaving that stupid bite there for? SO many people do this and there is no way in hell that that many people are truthfully too full to take that one last dumb bite so often. You ate that whole fucking thing, just eat the damn bite. Might I add, it's totally acceptable to leave more than one bite, it's just the one that makes me want to choke you. I KNOW you didn't just get full, either you needed to stop a couple of bites ago or you just need to finish the job and stop being a pussy. And you know I'm worked up when I use the word pussy because I hate it. One incident stands out in my mind. When I was like 9, my girl scout troop was going to Sesame Place (aka the only reason I joined, I quit promptly after). In the car on the way we were eating bagels. Vanessa was sitting next to me and was about to finish her bagel, but as she was about to put the TINIEST last bite into her mouth she was like "I can't finish this" and threw it back into the bag. ...YES YOU CAN YOU JUST ATE THAT WHOLE BAGEL THERE IS NO WAY THAT .05 OUNCE PIECE OF BAGEL IS THE LAST STRAW. So yea, basically I know you can finish it. I hate you.
Love: Barnaby, my mustache monocle. He is the greatest thing in the universe. Nothing is better than him, so you can just give up anything that you think is awesome, because in comparison it sucks.
Barnaby makes everything better.
LOVE,
theGrump
Hate: When people eat all but one little bite of something. WHAT are you leaving that stupid bite there for? SO many people do this and there is no way in hell that that many people are truthfully too full to take that one last dumb bite so often. You ate that whole fucking thing, just eat the damn bite. Might I add, it's totally acceptable to leave more than one bite, it's just the one that makes me want to choke you. I KNOW you didn't just get full, either you needed to stop a couple of bites ago or you just need to finish the job and stop being a pussy. And you know I'm worked up when I use the word pussy because I hate it. One incident stands out in my mind. When I was like 9, my girl scout troop was going to Sesame Place (aka the only reason I joined, I quit promptly after). In the car on the way we were eating bagels. Vanessa was sitting next to me and was about to finish her bagel, but as she was about to put the TINIEST last bite into her mouth she was like "I can't finish this" and threw it back into the bag. ...YES YOU CAN YOU JUST ATE THAT WHOLE BAGEL THERE IS NO WAY THAT .05 OUNCE PIECE OF BAGEL IS THE LAST STRAW. So yea, basically I know you can finish it. I hate you.
Love: Barnaby, my mustache monocle. He is the greatest thing in the universe. Nothing is better than him, so you can just give up anything that you think is awesome, because in comparison it sucks.
LOVE,
theGrump
Friday, August 26, 2011
Don't Stop Believin'
The gayest title, but it's been coming up a lot in my life recently (mostly in tv that I'm watching online aka Party Down and The Glee Project btw I love Party Down and The Glee Project is embarrassing yet addictive) and is sort of relates to what I'm about to hate right now.
Hate: Lindsay from The Glee Project. She is horrible and just not a real person. I know it's like reality tv and I'm just seeing what they want me to see, but I don't care. HATE her. Her critique is always that she doesn't have a personality and she gets all fake upset about it, but she just doesn't. She's amazingly conceited and totally fake and I despise her more than life. Example, during the vulnerability week (yes I know how embarrassing this is) her vulnerability was fake, but only because Ryan told her she was fake, she didn't understand what it actually meant. Her reason for choosing fake as her vulnerability was because "people only saw her as a trophy" or something ridiculous like that rather than I don't have a personality so I just do things I think people want me to do. Lindsay, everyone hates you you are not a trophy. I am currently watching the finale of The Glee Project and am rooting against her. Good god panel PLEASE don't choose her. OMG THANK GOD SHE DIDN'T WIN, yet she's still doing something I hate, she's pretending to be way too overly happy for the person that won and not at all upset she didn't win. Oh god now this show got too gay and two people won, jesus. I need to stop watching. Oh god now everyone won something, I hate this.
I'm too upset about Lindsay's horrible persona winning anything and not sitting there crying to love about anything.
theGrump
Hate: Lindsay from The Glee Project. She is horrible and just not a real person. I know it's like reality tv and I'm just seeing what they want me to see, but I don't care. HATE her. Her critique is always that she doesn't have a personality and she gets all fake upset about it, but she just doesn't. She's amazingly conceited and totally fake and I despise her more than life. Example, during the vulnerability week (yes I know how embarrassing this is) her vulnerability was fake, but only because Ryan told her she was fake, she didn't understand what it actually meant. Her reason for choosing fake as her vulnerability was because "people only saw her as a trophy" or something ridiculous like that rather than I don't have a personality so I just do things I think people want me to do. Lindsay, everyone hates you you are not a trophy. I am currently watching the finale of The Glee Project and am rooting against her. Good god panel PLEASE don't choose her. OMG THANK GOD SHE DIDN'T WIN, yet she's still doing something I hate, she's pretending to be way too overly happy for the person that won and not at all upset she didn't win. Oh god now this show got too gay and two people won, jesus. I need to stop watching. Oh god now everyone won something, I hate this.
I'm too upset about Lindsay's horrible persona winning anything and not sitting there crying to love about anything.
theGrump
Monday, August 22, 2011
Azul
Hate: When people wear snow boots in the summer, or really any inappropriate weather. This is something I've never noticed before in my entire life until today. Randomly I saw like 5 people doing this today, which under the circumstances is a ridiculous number. Maybe it was because of the small differences in temperature over the last few days. The weekend was a WHOPPING 80 fucking degrees, and today was like 70 and overcast. I will agree that 70 is not ideal warmth for the middle of August, but there is absolutely no fucking call for snow boots. it's 70 goddamn degrees outside. The first girl I saw I was mad about it, like why the hell are you wearing those boots with a freaking fur lining when the majority of people outside are in sandals? The next girl I was just confused, like what is this snow boot epidemic hitting Capitol Hill right now? Then the next person I was furious again, and the hate just grew and grew. It was so stupid, if I see anyone wearing snow boots tomorrow I'm going to trip them.
Love: Kitchen gadgets. I don't even cook all that much, but I totally love all of the ridiculous things for your kitchen. The as seen on tv section is heaven, as is bed bath and beyond. When I was little I forced my mom to buy the rotato, if anyone remembers that gem. Also I would consider my favorite possession , my slush mug, to be a kitchen gadget. You should just see my kitchen drawers, I have a problem.
:)
theGrump
Love: Kitchen gadgets. I don't even cook all that much, but I totally love all of the ridiculous things for your kitchen. The as seen on tv section is heaven, as is bed bath and beyond. When I was little I forced my mom to buy the rotato, if anyone remembers that gem. Also I would consider my favorite possession , my slush mug, to be a kitchen gadget. You should just see my kitchen drawers, I have a problem.
:)
theGrump
Sunday, August 21, 2011
E'ry Day I'm Shufflin'
Hate: The song "If you Want my Body" by Rod Stewart. I didn't have any feelings towards this song until the chips ahoy commercial (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlpS-V8mgIk). It was so revolting it made me not want to eat the cookies AND hate the song with a passion. The cookie's voice is THE most annoying. It isn't at all funny, it is awful and makes me so angry. Also, you aren't sexy, you're a fucking cookie. AND the animation in the commercial sucks, it's not appealing at all, it's weird and gross and so is the girl that the cookie is seducing (vom). Who the hell do they have on their advertising team over there?? I hope they're all dead by now. Smote by god for their horrific ideas. (I just had to look up the past tense of smite, apparently it's smote.)
Love: Adult gummy vitamins. Genius. Who would ever want to stop taking gummy vitamins?
LOVE,
theGrump
Love: Adult gummy vitamins. Genius. Who would ever want to stop taking gummy vitamins?
LOVE,
theGrump
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